Guess What?!
I didn't hear anything back from Newsjack last Thursday.
At all.
On to next week.
The Best Rejection Ever
So, it's Saturday night when I write this. I've just come back from Manchester where I got drowned walking down Deansgate, but that can't dampen my mood.
I've been rejected quite a lot in my life (Awww!), but this past Thursday I think I received my favourite rejection ever.
As many of you may know, or may know now that I am choosing to tell you, I have written material and submitted it to Newsjack (search my blog for previous posts if you want to know more, or click here). Well this past week saw the start of Series 5 and dutifully I began to write sketches, one liners and corrections as per the submission criteria.
For Series 5, Episode 1 I wrote 2 sketches, 9 one liners and a correction.
I submitted them, and then forgot about it (if you count thinking about them all the time as forgetting) until I returned home after work on Thursday. I loaded up my email and then noticed I had a new email in my Junk folder. Strange, thought I, as I don't normally get junk email on that account.
So I take a look.
The email subject reads: "Newsjack"
Excitedly I open the email.
It's a mass rejection email.
As I've said before in previous posts, if they don't select your material for the show, you never hear from the team.
But I heard from them.
So my material made it to the recording on attempt number 13: Yay!
Then it was cut: Boo! (Unlucky 13)
But it's awesome, because this is the first time that I have ever heard back from them.
The email said my stuff had been recorded but cut for time. This can mean one of two things. At the recording it died and didn't get a laugh, or it was funny but was simply cut for time. I hope it was the second one and not the first, but I'll never know.
So I must be getting better at joke writing. Hurray. In an effort to find out what joke(s) or sketch made it through the selection process (so that I could try to write more in that style) I emailed the Newsjack Team back and simply asked. They were very nice and emailed me back almost straight away.
And so here is the joke (which I can identify as the only "correction" that I wrote that week) that made it through to the recording:
Last week we reported a Brazillian judge had ordered a halt to work on Sao Paulo airport. We were wrong when we said all they had left was a landing strip.
So what does this tell us? Firstly that jokes about lady gardens are funny. And that they almost make it to air on BBC Radio 4 Extra, and that this week I should figure out a way to work "landing strip" into all my gags. But that might be a little easier than done because I'm here writing this blog post instead of working on jokes.
Oh well, you can't have everything.
And remember kids, If I blog about Newsjack again next week it means I might have something on, besides my underpants.
Until next time,
Matt.
A Good Day
A few weeks ago I wrote about my quest to submit jokes to the weekly @ComedyHighlight #win100 Competition on Twitter.
It has been a rather busy writing week this week. I've been writing stand up material, sketches for BBC Radio 7's Newsjack (SPOILER ALERT: I didn't get anything on this week) and trying to redraft a sitcom for some friends. I was even ill during the middle of the week which didn't help matters. (Except the weight loss of 4lbs since last Friday, but I've got a few more weeks to put it back before I'm scheduled to blog about that again.)
But at the start of the week I thought up a joke for this week's ComedyHighlight competition and Tweeted it:
What do you call an evil pizza topping? The anti-crust. #win100.
I didn't give it much thought after that. I'd be lying if I said I was ultra-confident about my submission. The real reason why I didn't submit more jokes, is because that is the only one liner I managed to write this week. Had I written more, I would have submitted them.
So I switched on the PC when I arrived home tonight and was surprised to learn that I won.
And not just "placed" won, but "won" won. As in 1st place.
I don't think I'm under selling the fact that I'm really ecstatic that I've won.
This is the first time that I've ever been paid for my writing.
£100. I couldn't be happier.
I'm hoping that this is the turning point regarding my writing. (Obviously not based on the quality of these blog posts.) The win won't count for anything on Monday morning when the competition opens again for new entries and I'll have just the same chance as everyone else. But at least for this weekend I can count myself a winner.
Turns out my MSN horoscope for February 2011 was right:
You could finally get paid for a job on the 18th, but there won't be much left over after you pay the bills.
So I'm going to enjoy my working weekend. That is assuming that I don't balls up my stand up performance in class tomorrow. Then the weekend will be spent working hard on trying to come up with some sketches for week 3 of Newsjack because that's another goal I want to accomplish. And I've got 4 more shows in this series to make it happen.
So enjoy your weekend everyone. May it be very creative.
Matt.
Newsjack Off!
So about eight or nine weeks ago as my introduction to improv course was drawing to a close, I made the decision that I would stop procrasinating and try my hand at writing sketch comedy.
Earlier in the year (February), I happened across a Writing Opportunity on the BBC Writer's Room website. It was for a Radio Sketch Series entitled Newsjack, a satirical look at topical events in the UK and around the globe.
In the past I had only attempted sketches sporadically, and had never actually got as far as an ending I liked. By the time I saw the announcement on the site, there was four weeks left in the current series. I gave it a go. Half-heartedly, admittedly. I think that I attempted about three sketches over the remainder of the series. But, as usual with my writing, one of three things happened: I never finished it, it went way over the recommended length, or it just didn't have any funny lines in it. On at least two occassions, a combination of all three. The third did have some funny stuff in, but I probably just subconsciously stole that from Keith Chegwin. So the tale ends with me not submitting anything that series.
Flash forward a couple of months (though not in the US TV Series style, because I haven't been cancelled yet, despite the desires of several people and my constant low ratings) and I found myself at the Manchester Comedy Store for the Improv course, having just finished Script Frenzy (something else script related that never gets finished - Sorry, "That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore", you're time may come yet, honest!) and I was surrounded by people who liked comedy like I did, but weren't as crap at improv as I turned out to be.
While waiting for the class to begin one day, a few of us started talking with the Comedy Sportz UK head honcho about sketch comedy, Saturday Night Live, Second City, and a few other shows. This discussion was sparked because like the sketch comedy poser that I am, I was reading "The Second City Unscripted: Revolution and Revelation at the World-Famous Comedy Theater". What can I say, I like attention, and I gained a few friends out of it, so it paid off in the end. Anyway, the Head Honcho informed us that she was thinking of doing a sketch writing course. I immediately signed up, thinking that this could be the kick in the pants I needed to see my writing things through.
At the same time, I saw on the BBC Writer's Room that Series 3 of Newsjack would begin broadcasting on Thursday 17th June 2010 for six weeks, until 22nd July 2010. I resolved that this would be the series of Newsjack that I would actually submit something to the show. It would also give me an opportunity to get a little better and not embarrass myself in front of people I would actually meet and get feedback from.
For the first show, I managed to write a sketch and a few one lines and a couple of corrections (see the Newsjack page for an explanation of what they are). They didn't get picked for the show.
For the second show, I managed to write two sketches, and a few one lines. They didn't get picked for the show.
For the third show, I managed to write two sketches, a few one lines and some corrections. They didn't get picked for the show.
For the fourth show, I managed to write three sketches, a few one lines and some corrections. They didn't get picked for the show.
For the fifth show, I struggled to write a sketch (but I did it), a few one lines and some corrections. They didn't get picked for the show.
For the sixth and final show (this past week), I resolved to go all out and really give it my best. If this part of my life were to be made into a movie, this is where the "training" montage would kick in.
I wrote 2, in my own opinion, great sketches, 10 one liners and a couple of corrections.
I emailed them in and nervously waited for the deadline.
And waited.
And...
They didn't get on.
"Boo! Hiss! He's behind you!" I hear you cry.
Okay, so while I haven't become a professional writer in this past six weeks, I have learned a few valuable lessons:
Firstly, I have learned to finish a sketch. Yay! A big acheivement for me.
Secondly, I have submitted material to someone. And not just someone, to the BBC! At least I'll be able to tell someone's kids about it one day, even if they do say "What's the BBC? And why aren't you wearing any pants?"
Thirdly, I have developed a thicker skin with regards to rejection. I got rejected six weeks in a row. Okay, so the rejection wasn't complete rejection, because I never actually heard back from the BBC. I could be a laughing stock within the BBC, but I won't know about it. As it says on the Newsjack site:
It is a showcase for new comedy writing so anyone can submit material. We accept sketches and short jokes every week of the six week run. The best submissions will make it into the 28 minute show. All submissions will be read but sadly, due to the overwhelming number of entries, we do not have time to give feedback to most people.
With that in mind, I can now say that I am now one of the many rather than one of the few. So, at least I have Spock in my corner, when it comes to this sort of thing.
Fourthly, despite being rejected, I feel that I am gaining momentum with my writing. I say momentum, because for this past six weeks I have been writing regularly. After submissions closed for the final show, and while I was waiting to hear back from the producers (I've always wanted to say that: "Oh, I'm just waiting for feedback from the producer"), I decided to start writing a short story that I will enter into a competition. After all, what's the worst they're going to do? That's right, say no and ridicule my penis.
On top of all that, I feel that I haven't let my brain turn to mush since the end of the improv course. This blog post alone is over 1000 words and I have that Sketch Writing Workshop starting on 31st July 2010.
Hopefully, I will be a sketch genius after this course.
So look out, BBC!
Look out, Newsjack!
I'm going to be writing for Series 4...
...And this time, it's personal!
