Because I am not trusted with sharp or even blunt objects, it was my job to stand there and make sure the art (or rat as I just typed there quickly and then backspaced so that you would never know that I ahve a tendency to mistpye things when I type at nomal speed) was lined up correctly and did not end up askew once the nails had been plunged into the walls.

Now I know what you are thinking:

"But Matt, don't you have one leg shorter than the other?"

I did try explaining that to the powers that be, but there was a lack of understanding on their part. Well, it must have been their part as I understood everything that I mumbled under my breath.

So, it became time to apply the nails to the wall. As I said, I have been barred from handling any sort of DIY thingy (or tools as I'm told they are called when I harass the greeter in B&Q) which left the others to get the nails into the wall, with me standing there leaning to one side. As we are a simple, yet luxurious office nestled in the middle of a rural area, it was most apparent we did not have a hammer (or even a bale of hay). This would cause us problems when we tried to hammer in the evening.

"Matt, what can we use instead of a hammer?" I was asked.

"How about the heel of a shoe?" I replied, not thinking that they would actually take me seriously.

They did.

I only wish the person who had been using the shoe had also worn socks. But it was a change for me, when I'm around most women only remove their footwear to hit me with it. Don't get me wrong, I was still pummelled by the shoe, but at least I got to broaden my horizons by seeing what other uses footwear can have.

And so, in the late evening, framed art was put applied to the walls in an IT company by hammering it in place with the heel of a shoe. And just what did you do last night that was so great?