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15Jan/150

Diary Of An Unphilistine

Australia - Thursday 15th January 2015 - Day 2 - Brisbane.

It rained yesterday all day but today it was 30 degrees in the shade, so I have been to a shopping centre with air con. Sadly there is no Morrison's. But sacrifices have to be made somewhere.

I have had coffee and food and I can already feel those 53lbs I lost before venturing over here creeping back on.

Weight gain or no, I've already been wowing the locals with my fashion sense.

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Until next time, keep being stylish.

M.

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14Jan/150

Diary of an Unphilistine

Australia - Day 1 - Wednesday 14 January 2015 - Brisbane

Thought I'd start my new life with a bit of a diary (however infrequently it gets posted.)

My final destination is Melbourne, but I'm spending a few weeks in Brisbane with family first.

Arrived in Brisbane at 6.40am local time on Wednesday. Managed to sleep a bit (probably 6 hours) on the 13 hour 20 minute Dubai to Brisbane leg (and for an hour or so on the Manchester To Dubai leg). I awoke on the plane at 2am Brisbane time. It was my best "sleeping on a plane" journey ever. The only low point was when I dipped the tip of my tie in the baked beans on my breakfast plate once we landed in Dubai. I handled it as deftly as the next International Man of Mystery by sucking the end of my tie to remove the rich tomato sauce. After all, I'm not a philistine. I don't normally travel in a suit, because I don't normally take one. Since I'm emigrating here (and I'll need a job at some point) I figured I better bring the suit. The jacket is fairly heavy and bulky so it made sense to wear it rather than pack it.

After going through e-immigration at Brisbane airport (very quick as opposed to the man at the desk variety of years past) I got my bags and was at my relatives for 8am ish. My British mobile didn't update the time automatically on arrival, so I can't be 100% sure.

Spent the day unpacking at my Auntie and Uncle's and talking to visiting cousins. Ate tea (think I'll always call the evening meal that because I'm from North West of England) of Lasagna and I managed not to spill any of it on my still pristine white shirt. (And didn't spill anything else on the shirt during the entire trip barring the bean juice incident in Dubai.) As I was getting undressed to go to bed (I know what you're thinking, and yes, I do sing the Stripper music to myself during the whole process. Every single time as it makes it into a cardio workout. Though I am glad the tassels did not flag up any issues when I went through the body scanners at the airport.), I noticed there was a small speck of lasagna sauce on my outer cuff. Great, now I'll need to wash it before I wear it again. Not being a philistine is a lot of work these days.

Went to bed after a quick shower at 10pm. Then the smoke alarm went off. It was annoying at first, but after a while the sound (in association with the smoke) enabled me to drift off to sleep easily.

PS. There was even 10MB of free wifi on the DXB to BNE route because it was an A380. Here's me in my shirt and tie at 35,000 feet just off the Northern coast of Australia:

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Not pictured, the bean juiced end of the tie.

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